Love yourself — It’s the first step to fulfil your desires

Photo by Content Pixie on Unsplash

“Love” :) — An emotional feeling of respect, warmth or affection. Every human on this earth wants to love or wanna loved by someone. Love gives the freedom to believe in ourself, a sense of fulfilment and a feeling of joy. It makes us realize who we are and how we can find our true self.

You can find your love in any form it can be your parents, money, car, house, job, travelling, nature. And you have a guy or girl who randomly came into your life and became the most important person of it.

Though, If I talk about self-love, then everyone will keep himself at the second position and that too when internal happiness is the most integral part to fulfil our desires.

However, let’s take it on the other side and ask, how should your love be?. Well, if you love something, you always fall for that all over again, no matter how hard it is to get or achieve. It excites you every day, after months or even after years.

But, when it comes to finding our true love, we always looked outside of our window and love those things which give us temporary happiness. We tend to forget that, no matter how enticing this can be at first later we all feel trapped into it.

And then it makes us so depressed that we slowly forget our true self. we lost our smile, focus, self-esteem, our life goals, family, friends, mental peace and so on.

Hence, no wonder, people will face the most difficult situations not because of love but of the over expectation from their loved ones and this mental chaos will lead them to grief. Which then change into hate and all become victims of the most lovable thing in this world i.e. love.

Here I want you to understand that just by giving your time, energy and focus to those things, won’t get you true satisfaction, your heart won’t respond right until your soul find you.

Therefore, if you wanted to find your true love, just stop feeling bad for yourself and don’t listen to others. The only person you can fall in love with is you, you are the one who’s responsible for your smile.

I know its not an overnight process, love yourself the same way you love someone else is quite a high job. But if you truly understand the meaning of love then it will give the freedom and happiness you ever imagined.

Well, let me explain more when you love someone, you want them to be happy, no. So when it comes to your self why you compromise and let you suffer, just to make others happy. When you love something or someone from your heart then everything happens from both sides.

See, I’m not saying that whenever we love, we are compromising or we are not respecting our choices no. The only point is to give yourself equal importance no matter how tough it looks at first or what other people feel or say about you.

we can’t control the lives, thoughts or deeds of the people around us, it’s impossible. Whenever we love these material or non-material things or Should I say things of the outer world. We make our expectation so high that we forget who we are? and what we want from our life?

And when those materialistic things which nothing but the disappointment of our imagination would break our trust so hard that we didn’t get time to recalculate ourself, and drained in the sea of sadness. Things which we thought would get us everything, suddenly disappears like it never happened.

Honestly, from the day I started to understand the meaning of love, I realise that if you truly “love yourself” and “respect your choices”. Then “everything will fall into his place” :) and start working for you. This is the only way to achieve anything in your life freedom, respect, healthy mind, self-discipline and the uncommon desires which you ever imagine will come true.

Earlier in my life, when I don’t know this I easily stumbled upon anyone, believe anyone for my own sake of good. But, when those same people started to give me gushes and pointing the finger on me, even for their problems, then not just externally but internally also I believe them true and fell off. I lost my happiness and cut out myself from the world feeling that I would never be happy again or can’t achieve anything in my life. I know, it’s tougher to explain your mind than to external people.

“Look in the mirror that’s where your true happiness lies”

But, nothing comes easy in this world and when we give so much of our time to those who are not worth it. Then spending or utilising the same time on our self will not a waste. So, If you truly wanted to feel happy and want everything started working for you, then considering yourself in any decision should be a priority, take care of your family but don’t forget yourself.

• Self-love means — you help others but when it comes to choosing you to help yourself first. It doesn’t make you selfish or careless, let other people think what they want to, Do what is right, what is important. At the end what matters is how you feel, is your heart pumps up with a sense of satisfaction? sense of completeness? or feeling of love:)
• It means you want/must have good people in your life, who inspire you to move forward.
• You should love everything which relates to you, it could be anything your family, friends, office, books, home, your laptop, your body, your mind, your flaws, your mistakes so choose wisely.
• Self-love doesn’t let you become selfless, it doesn’t mean if once in a while you said no to others (Husband/lover, family) just to give yourself a “ME” time, then its reduces your worth in their life. If they truly love you then definitely they will respect your choices:)
• Self-love gives you the courage to find love in another person, you will be happy if you are with someone. But you are happy too when living alone.

There are so many ways which one can apply according to their perspective of life. But, below three, are my personal favourite and I think one of the best possible ways, which I applied to get a new point of view and I hope you shall too get something out of it.

1. Think Here & Now: First of all, make a habit to be in present and the best way for this, is to meditate and read anything of your interest. If your mind gets a healthy and positive outlook then, in no time you feel changes in your life. I know, It won’t happen overnight but spending your half-hour on practising these two habits consistently (Read for 20 mts and meditate for 10 mts) will take you much ahead. Trust me, your life started working for you, you will gain a whole new perspective and others will notice it for you.
2. Be honest with yourself and say “no” when you need to — Why on this earth we always believe that if we said no to others, despite having no interest in doing that work, will make us wrong. Everybody needs to understand, that making others happy is a nice job but, not compromising with your emotion or feelings. If you are not comfortable or feeling good, then there is no point to do that. And those who love you truly will get your point no matter what. Being honest with your feelings is another way to make yourself happy and let people realise your worth.
3. Feeling of gratitude — One of the profound practices, one can apply in their life is to be grateful for what we already have. I’m telling you, this is insanely powerful, you have heard this a million times. But, once you consistently apply this to your life, you will see things started to appear for which you ever dreamed about. And, for those also which you already have become multiplied. In this regard, I’m specifically speaking about internal satisfaction:

a) self-confidence/Self-esteem b) Feeling of completeness c) Psychological and physical benefits d) It opens the door to more relationships

And therefore, you can start small, thankful for your home, your parents, good friends, wind, clean water, your health,(your eyes, hands, legs, all your body organs etc:), wind, rain, sun and all the beautiful nature which gives you a sense of satisfaction.

I hope that the lines I wrote above have given you a smile to improve your life or give you the first step to improve your life. People out there who are fighting from stress and anxiety and can’t feel calm or peaceful during the day. I hope you will get maybe not full but small help and started to feel happy and then I’m leaving you with this beautiful quote:

“Be honest with yourself otherwise” you have to cheat on your heart lifetime” ~ Unkown

Let me know in the comments below whats your thoughts on this or you can share your ways as well to me on how we love our self more and more and live the life of our dreams.